guffawsungraciously | psl time: single dad au edition

[...damn it. Of course Hendrik only notices him in the instance where he specifically doesn’t want to be noticed.

...and of course, he stops in his tracks when addressed, because this is the first time Hendrik has actually spoken to him in Goddess knows how long and despite everything telling him to keep moving or lash out in anger, he...

...

Damn it, he wants an excuse to have an actual conversation. Or at least test the waters for a conversation. He wants things to feel even vaguely like they used to, if only for a few minutes. By all indications she’s still asleep, it’s fine, he can continue to pass her off as a loaf of bread...]

It certainly is an evening, yes, though given the weather I am reluctant to call it “good.”

[...okay, he’s pretty sure his tone was level. He doesn’t want to just discuss the weather, though... ah, wait.]

I see you are still keeping in Obsidian’s good graces, then?

[.........obsidian is cool okay he likes obsidian even if he’s never going to ride that horse.... he doesn’t need to he likes just saying hi..............]

[He smiles more at that slightly acerbic reply that he hasn't heard in so long. It was ... so typically Jasper that he can only look at him with fondness.]

Yes, that is true. The weather certainly took a turn this season. I have not seen such heavy snowfall in years.

[Definitely not in the years since they returned from their training.

...That was over seven years ago now. Skies above, has it really been that long?

He's jostled from that line of thought by Jasper switching topics to Obsidian, and he chuckles as the horse snaps his teeth in his direction, impatient for another treat. He offers the horse a carrot, watching as half of it is promptly chomped up.]

We have established a decent enough rapport. I fear he may be too expectant of extra treats nowadays, with the cold keeping the horses in.

[He hesitates to ramble more on the topic. It's hardly what he wants to talk about. So he asks a question of his own, voice a little tentative.]

...How are you?

Hmph. I had thought I left this sort of weather back in Sniflheim, where it belongs. Everything else aside, it will not do to have our fine steeds become lazy and spoiled from being shut in all winter.

[Even if the last statement is somewhat sarcastic, his tone has lightened a bit; even if he’s a little suspicious of how sincere it is, it’s... nice to see Hendrik smile at him like that.

...of course, his mood immediately plummets at that question, because, well. Well. Where does he even begin... or should he even begin? He tries not to stare a thousand yards past Hendrik, even if that’s his immediate reaction... but honestly, where would he even start. No one else has noticed the king is possessed. He doubts anyone would believe him if he tried to tell them, and he feels like that almost has to do with him more than anything. Why else would he still be alive at this point? Not even Hendrik, who will probably not deign to talk to him again for another few—

...ah, there’s... shit, the bundle is wiggling a bit. She must be waking up. He swallows and manages a response.]

I have been perfectly fine, and unfortunately I must be going, because I have a—

[A small, fussy grunt emanates from the bundle and he kind of freezes mid-sentence................]

[It's ... strange to see Jasper's lightening expression freeze so quickly. Not simply strange, but ... vaguely alarming? His question had been pretty innocuous. Innocent, even. Did something happen? He has ... not been a very good friend admittedly and been bad about keeping up with Jasper, but--

He stops going down that mental rabbit hole to listen as Jasper begins to speak, but even that is interrupted by...

Hendrik steps away from Obsidian, hardly minding that the horse snatches the rest of the carrot from him and almost clamps on his fingers in the process. His eyes are on the bundle in Jasper's arms. He can't actually see anything, between the way Jasper is holding it and the wrappings completely encasing it, and there's a part of him that can't even process the thought that is poking its way to the forefront of his mind.]

Jasper...? What is that?

[shit, shit, shit, on some level he was sure everyone would find out eventually because that was just how things were, but something felt especially shameful about Hendrik specifically finding out...

Jasper’s gaze darts around the stables, as he wonders if he should just make a run for it...]

A loaf of fresh bread.

[...the poorly considered lie just kind of slips out in an almost pleading tone, even as the alleged loaf continues to wiggle in his arms and make fussy little sounds. He’s. He’s walking towards the stairs again...]

[Hendrik doesn't know what to think about the panic that enters Jasper's eyes at his question, and he's not given much of a chance to chase any one thought beyond "A loaf of bread?" before Jasper is walking right past him and towards the side entryway to the castle.]

Jasper!

[He almost knocks over the sack he'd brought with him in his hurry to give chase, reaching out to grab his friend's shoulder.]

That was a very poor lie. Pray tell, what is going on?

[He doesn’t want to deal with this, he needs to get back to his room and make a plan, oh shit, she’s probably hungry, what does he even do about that... he tries to think back to what all happened with—]

This does not concern you one bit, Hendrik.

[Jasper... tries to shrug the hand off his shoulder, and regardless of whether or not he’s successful, he tries to...

...oh no he should probably see if he can calm her down before he keeps going into the castle proper because with as fussy as she’s being it’ll probably alert literally everyone there. He... awkwardly stops again and gently... pats her? Oh no, it isn’t helping, she’s just wiggling more and continuing to make noise. Goddess, he should have babysat Jade when everything was going to hell with the Queen but in his defense he was a distressed child who thought babies were gross.........]

[His question, as well as his hand, is shrugged off. Hendrik lets his arm drop, a little torn. As a general, he shouldn't be overly familiar or insistent with lower-ranked officers, especially those not under his command. But he isn't going about this from the angle of rank... And Jasper has to be aware of that, as he's not referring to titles or anything like that.

Is this because he hasn't been around...?

Well, regardless, he's nothing if not persistent. Especially when it looks like Jasper's hesitating to actually leave the stables and is instead focusing on his ... uh, loaf of bread.]

Your, er, bread is making noise.

[That's just too dumb, even for him. He says nothing for a long moment before murmuring, uncomfortable.]

Why are you sneaking around with a baby, Jasper?

[Jasper realizes perhaps a bit belatedly that his behavior probably could get him in trouble for insubordination... and he should probably relax a bit from the fact that Hendrik hasn’t tried to pull rank on him yet. Granted, even at Jasper’s most... cynical, he supposed, he found it a bit hard to imagine him pulling rank on anyone.

...

He wondered... how honest he should be. He probably had to come up with some sort of explanation now, but...]

I have been entrusted with her for the time being, and...

[...hang on, maybe if he rocks her a little bit? That should probably help, right...?]

...I do not wish to deal with any more trouble than necessary. That is all.

[...well, she sounds a little less upset by baby standards?? He thinks?? But she’s still a little noisy...

...

It’s probably bad to use Snooze on babies, right.]

[Hendrik relaxes a little when Jasper relents; he really doesn't know what he would have done if Jasper had kept walking. Drag him back? Cause something of a scene just outside of the castle?

The explanation placates him for the moment, though questions are quick to stream through his head. Why was he entrusted with a baby? Why did he think he would be dealing with trouble? Did he think--

Did he think the baby would interfere with his work?

He frowns to himself, trying to get an actual look at the swaddled baby while trying not to ask any of those questions in his head. So...

He finds another question to ask instead.]

Do you have baby supplies? You-- ah, you do not seem to be carrying much.

[The baby looks like a baby. I mean they all use the same model. Jade and the Luminary? Identical, except for the clothes colors! Well, I guess we can forgive the game devs a bit of laziness, even if those eyes are way too big for squinty, red-faced newborns who don’t even know what the fuck.

...unlike the baby Luminary’s character model, if Hendrik can get a good look (and he might be able to now that she seems to be chilling out a bit since Jasper’s slightly less noticeably panicky), this one’s got a tuft of bluish gray hair like no one in particular and yellow irises much like a certain other individual here, though, hm. Jasper’s admittedly trying to subtly pull her away a bit, though...]

Ah...

[...]

...no, it was all something... fairly sudden, and I did not want to stop anywhere on the way back given the weather...

[The baby looks like a baby. Hendrik tilts his head at the tiny face, unable to discern the age of the child besides being no more than a few months old. Less than three months? That just seems awfully irresponsible, entrusting such a young child at an age when the baby should be breastfeeding.

His brows knit together as he tries to figure out what to do. He doesn't think the castle kitchens will have milk this late; any such ingredients would be used for dinner desserts.

But it's a baby. He'd heard enough from his older sisters and mother that babies had to eat frequently. And sleep frequently.]

Then...

[He shakes himself. He needs to be decisive. Or at least feign it in this situation.]

Then I will fetch supplies for you. I presume you will be returning to your room? I can drop them off once I return.

...That—

[Jasper briefly looks down at the child to see if she looks calmer, and... the fact of the matter is that the baby is very young and very vulnerable, and he at least needs to keep her healthy until he can find a better caretaker than a single male knight living in a castle with a king who’s possessed by a demon and no one else has noticed it.

(Alternatively, a single male knight going mad from stress and hallucinating that the king has been possessed by a demon. He’s wondered about the possibility more than once over the past few years.)

And someone should probably be keeping an eye on her, and she’s better off in here where it’s warm instead of being dragged around the city in the snow...

...instead of continuing his protest, he lets out an affronted sigh.]

...fine. Just tell me what I owe you when you return.

[There's still a slight fear that his help will be rejected, even with all he's trying to do to sound accommodating. He doesn't know the situation, but Jasper's stress and that tiny baby are more than enough reason to go check if any stores are still open.

He tries not to look too relieved by that reluctant acceptance, glancing back over at Obsidian. He hadn't brought out his saddle for obvious reasons, but riding bareback for a short while shouldn't be too much of an issue.]

I will try to be quick. Babies should be fed every four hours at the very least.

[With one last earnest look aimed at Jasper, Hendrik tries to pick through his rucksack to see if he'd brought anything useful along other than food. A hood and a towel, which he could use when he returned. He offers Obsidian one last carrot before hurrying off towards the stable doors through which Jasper had entered earlier.]

...yes, right, of course...

[...he says, with the distracted air of someone trying to mentally figure out how much time is elapsed...]

I will... see you then.

[...she seems calm enough as Hendrik leaves, so Jasper heads up into the castle. Fortunately, it’s relatively quiet.

...no, wait, as he walks further in, it almost seems too deserted. People should still be milling about and patrolling, shouldn’t they? Maybe it’s just that he arrived at the perfect time... or maybe, as the cold chill running through his spine and hairs sticking up on the back of his neck would suggest, he’s already been noticed.

“I had wondered what sort of explanation you would provide for your sudden absence, Jasper. It seems as though some prior carelessness has caught up to you, has it not? Now, how closely should I follow how King Carnelian would have reacted to this, I wonder...”

He swallows, trying to come across as calm despite how pointless he knows it to be. It’s an instinct that he can’t shake off, even in the face of the demon wearing the king’s body, who seems able to peer through skin, muscle, and bone straight though to his very soul...

...

He at least manages to get away physically unscathed. The child is outright crying instead of fussing, but he’s laser-focused on getting back to his room. If anyone tries to stop him he doesn’t notice, and he doesn’t quite come back to reality until the door to his room is tightly shut behind him and he’s slumped down against it.

...right. Calm down baby. Figure out where to set baby down for now. Maybe figure out... where baby should sleep...? Well, anyway, by the time Hendrik’s returned, the baby is aimlessly wiggling in the middle of his bed, and Jasper is going through his room for... anything that might be kind of useful? Also there is an open bottle of wine on his desk. It is clear that he’s started on it, but there’s no goblet in sight............]

[Obsidian is certainly more than a little confused, from what Hendrik can tell as he secures his rucksack and pats the horse. He's a well-bred horse, even if he's a remarkable stubborn and intelligent one, so being led around without a saddle or tack probably seems bizarre.]

Apologies, Obsidian. Unusual circumstances all around.

[He strokes the horse's mane once more before mounting. He's ridden bareback only a few times in the past, as a much younger lad learning about "harnessing wildness" under Don Rodrigo, but the bruises made the time ... memorable.

He still manages to lightly kick Obsidian into a walk and then into a trot, covering the snowy ground much faster than if he had trekked through the main streets. There is still a fair bit of lighting from the houses, but he will probably want to buy a lantern for the return trip just to be safe.

The general store is still open when he arrives, and the shopkeeper is more than a little surprised to see someone of his rank practically stumbling in. He apologizes for the late visit ... and apologizes again when he realizes he's not brought enough gold for more than a few things, but the shopkeeper is more than willing to settle the matter of money tomorrow.

The only things he can't get from the general store are the most important things... But he's thankful the shopkeeper locks up and gestures for him to follow over to the inn. Soon enough he's riding back up to the castle stables with what he hopes will be enough to keep the mysterious baby fed until morning.

After giving Obsidian a much needed toweling off, Hendrik hurries back into the castle, lugging a sack of goods. The round trip must have been nearly an hour, even trying to move quickly, and he knocks on the door across the hall from his own, in a way that he hasn't done for a good while now.

...He'll deal with that guilt and regret later. Yes.]

Jasper?

[Jasper freezes at the knock, but Hendrik’s voice is... a relief. He still finds himself walking to his desk to take an extra swig of wine, but...]

Come in, Hendrik.

[...he heads back over to his chaise, where he has a spare treasure chest on the table in front of him that he is in the process of trying to remove the lid of. There are already some spare blankets stuffed into it...

...

Wait, no, he should probably bring the baby over for a size comparison, especially since he’s going to be attending to her soon anyway. She’s fussing a bit as well, so. You know. Probably needs... something. Probably food? Maybe just attention. Well, in fairness, he kind of gets it...]

[Hendrik had completely forgotten about that hood on the return trip, so his hair is soaked with melted snow and skin somewhat flushed from the cold as he pushes one of the double doors open. He steps inside with a sack larger than the one he had back in the stables, looking tired but accomplished.]

My apologies for the delay. I had to go to the inn to buy milk.

[What a clever trick by the inn staff, milking in the afternoon and sticking the milk bottles in the snow to bring them down to a colder temperature quickly.

He walks over to join Jasper around the table, taking up the other side to place the bottle of cold milk, a half loaf of bread, bibs and clean squares of cloth, and medicinal ointment. There's also a lidded bucket, which takes the majority of space in the sack, with cleaning supplies inside it.]

This should be enough to get through the night. I do not know precisely how much the baby should be fed.

...

[Jasper had been so frazzled that he’d barely been able to keep track of the time Hendrik had been gone...]

I... believe it is fine, Hendrik. You ought to dry off a bit before you catch your death.

[...he’ll look through everything later, he’s pretty sure she’s hungry by now. He reaches for the bottle of milk, then... furrows his brow at Hendrik’s statement...]

...I would imagine she will stop eating when she is satisfied. That seems how these sorts of things go.

[he sounds a little uncertain, though... but okay. Hm. Let him... adjust her a bit, go for the bottle again, and sort of tilt it uncertainty so she can drink... it’s probably more awkward than a breast, but she seems to figure it out pretty quickly and quiets down from her fussing now that she has Food.]

How much do I owe you, in any case?

[He doesn’t look up to Hendrik, because he’s kind of focused on making sure he doesn’t, you know, spill anything. ...ah. He hasn’t... really spent that much time looking at her specifically, has he? Goddess, she’s so small... now that she isn’t swaddled, he sees her tiny fists balled up as she eats and...

...

Aw fuck there he goes. He shouldn’t get attached, he should probably find her a better home than this, it’s not like he doesn’t have connections, some childless noble family will probably welcome her... but does he trust them, is the thing.

...

Is that better than here? Better the devil you know and so on... ugh, damn it, why did this have to be happening...]

Ah, I do not actually know. I will settle the bill tomorrow when I go back to the store. Do not worry about payment.

[His brows knit together at the baby drinking from the cold bottle, concerned that the baby may have been so hungry that cold milk is considered an okay option.]

You will want to tip the bottle away once in awhile to see if the baby wants to continue drinking. It is very easy to overfeed a hungry baby.

[He ignores the suggestion to dry off for now, grabbing one of the bibs and approaching Jasper and the baby to slide the bib over the baby's chest. It's a level of interference he really shouldn't risk, considering how Jasper had reacted earlier, but he rationalizes that it's all to keep them somewhat clean.]

Edited 2020-07-04 06:34 (UTC)

...I am going to worry about payment whether we like it or not, you know.

[GRUMBLE GRUMBLE.

...also wait just a second, it’s probably because he’s stopped being in a state of panic....... mostly... but it’s just now clicking to him how weird this is.]

How do you know about all of this, anyway? Was childcare inexplicably part of your training in Puerto Valor...?

[.............he’s not bothered by the idea that Hendrik might know more about something than him, that would never be the case, he is completely secure in—

...honestly it’s probably a good thing Hendrik did that because before Jasper can protest the baby has a belated realization of EW, THIS MILK IS COLD, and starts fussing again. After she has been eating for a few seconds.]

What— I thought you were hungry...

[Hendrik's actually relieved that the baby stops drinking the cold milk, a little wary that she might get sick of the milk makes her body temperature drop. He's not actually sure if that can happen, but it certainly feels like it could, with a tiny baby. He addresses the baby ahead of any of Jasper's other comments.]

Babies will be used to warm milk, especially if they were breastfed at any point.

[He looks around Jasper's room. It's suddenly quite notable to him that Jasper doesn't have a glass for his wine anywhere.]

Do you have a teacup anywhere...? So we can set some milk by the hearth and let it warm.

[Actually, maybe if he doesn't address the matter of payment, Jasper will forget about it altogether.]

...ah, that... makes sense, I suppose.

[a surprisingly clever tactic, Hendrik, especially since Jasper keeps getting hung up on "how do you know so damned much about babies..." his mind goes in some pretty weird directions before settling on "he was way more enthusiastic about the baby princess, maybe he was more involved with helping out," even if it never quite gets to "he was the youngest of four and had to hear a bunch of embarrassing stories about himself."]

He sets the bottle back on the table before answering, since, well, baby isn't having a good time with it]

There is a tea set in the cabinet over there. It should not be too difficult for you to find.

[...oh, and she's made a mess of things, now that he's looking at her. The... bib is for wiping her face off, too, right? Best do that, while grumbling a little at her...]

...honestly, I should not encourage you lest you get picky and spoiled. You are already a little freeloader.

[grumble grumble, get a job, baby.]

Ah, a tea set.

[Hendrik heads over to the cabinet at Jasper's direction, opening it up; the tea set is easy enough to find in there. He grabs the teapot instead of the teacup, quickly deciding it would probably be better to warm up more milk considering he doesn't know how much the baby will drink. He takes the teapot and a teacup back over to the table, pouring milk into the teapot before carrying it over to fireplace to carefully position it nearby.

He doesn't really hear what Jasper is mumbling to the baby, remaining by the fireplace to keep an eye on the teapot, but it is a surprisingly heartwarming scene. He doesn't remember ever seeing Jasper hold the baby princess when they were children, but he imagines it would have been similar.

...If only the princess hadn't died.

...

Ah. With everything going on, he hadn't even asked one of the more important questions.]

So what is the little one's name?

[Jasper smiles fondly and gently pets her hair as he kind of... just razzes the hell out of the baby. gosh she's cute when she doesn't have milk all over her face and is looking at him in the constant bafflement that essentially functions as a baby's neutral expression.]

Hm, if we wanted to make you earn your keep, we could put you to work as an alarm, I imagine. You certainly are loud enough when you want to be.

[...oh, right, that question... he kind of... doesn't want to answer. because um.

...um.]

That would be... something of a work in progress.

[...

...

...]

She, erm.

[............................]

...do you think I should find a nice family or something like that.

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